I was reading a post on Robert Anthony’s blog (http://chastity-femdom.blogspot.com/2011/06/how-far-is-too-far.html), where he discusses the fact that individual taste, and tolerance, for various kinks, vary greatly. Someone who enjoys wearing women’s undergarments might be repulsed by watersports…and the opposite. This caused me to ponder my own “kinks”. I am not talking about my fantasies, as that is a whole other post, if not blog. But what do I actually do and enjoy that is not “vanilla”.
Unfortunately, “vanilla” is a rather ambiguous word in itself. I know folks for whom “vanilla” means sexual intercourse…period. I am not quite so pigeon-holed. “Vanilla”, to me, is anything that we do which doesn’t bump the naughty meter. In that category would fall vaginal sex (position is irrelevant), anal sex, oral sex, using dildos/vibrators/etc…, light spanking, tickling…you get the idea. Kink would be bondage, moderate to heavy S&M (clamps, clips, canes, crops, floggers, paddles, belts, wax), D/s, chastity devices, orgasm denial, breath play, needle play, watersports, etc…
I guess there are two approaches here. One is which kink I most enjoying giving. The other is which one I most enjoy receiving.
As to the former, it is really hard to say. What I most enjoy doing to NW depends on how she is reacting to what I am doing. When she is into it, doing one of many things will get me hard as a rock and leaking precum all over the place. Just tying her down can wind her up, but it is only mildly arousing to me. That is, unless she is being bound in order to lock her in place for some other activity.
If I had to pick one kink, though, it would be S&M. She gets so wound up, cums so hard and “spaces” so well. Seeing her hit her limit and try her damnedest to push past it. Hurting so bad (a hell of a lot more than I would ever even consider trying), but soaking it up and asking, sometimes begging, for more. All the lovely redness and marks that are left behind, from our play. I am getting aroused just writing this.
I especially love it when she is on all fours and I turn my attention to her pussy. Each stroke hurts like hell. She will often recoil, especially as it builds. Then it hits her, and she starts pushing back, exposing her pussy more and offering it up for more attention. How can one not find that orgasmically hot!?
I suppose that her submission would have to be a very close second, though. Not slave like submission, just the opening of herself to me and yielding to my desires. For instance, last night, I was working out (at home) and she was in there with me. She was laying on the floor, 3/4 on her stomach, and her ass was exposed. I walked over, rubbed her cheeks and she responded by closing her eyes and letting out a low moan. I wet my middle finger, in my mouth, and started rubbing her asshole. She responded well, so I inserted my finger about an inch and started wiggling it around. A minute or so later, she was having an orgasm. I then started thrusting my finger in and out, and she had two more. Then it was back to the workout. Sticking my finger in her ass was not kinky to me. The fact that she simply yielded to it, though, was hot as hell.
For my part, believe it or not, chastity/orgasm denial does not top the list. It is near the top, but CBT is king. Usually, my want of CBT comes in three different flavors. Number one is simply wanting additional stimulation. Maybe I am being stroked, or sucked, and I want mild or moderate CBT, usually in the form of squeezing or slapping, to add to the stimulation. Number two is simply wanting to hurt. I just get in the mood and I want to have my balls hurt. You know, like an ice cream craving that hits you. Maybe it is to feed my need for something non-vanilla. The third flavor emerges when I am being denied, and is most common when I am caged. In the absence of proper stimulation (stroking, sucking, riding), CBT provides an alternative stimulation to fill the gap. To reach that end, though, it needs to be rather extreme/harsh. After all, it is not the same type of stimulation.
The forms of CBT that I like are varied. The primary source is from NW squeezing my balls. She does not grab hold and go from zero to sixty, as that would be far too much to quick. Instead, she builds the pressure slowly, with playful flexes in between. Going this route, she can end up squeezing me almost as hard as is physically possible. And it is wonderful! In fact, we sometimes play the “game” where I will orally service her as she squeezes my balls. The closer she gets to orgasm, the harder she squeezes. Until she finally goes over the top and as I continue to fuel her orgasm, she squeezes me the hardest. That last of the pressure play would be ball crushing. I made a pathetic ball crusher, but it works. Balls go in and the boards come together. An intense, lasting pressure, that will make me orgasm, if the pressure is just right.
In addition to this, we will sometimes include slapping of the balls, either bound or not. We have indulged in punching them, when bound up, but that is not as common. The risks of doing it too often worry me. And, as inferred here, tying my balls up, tightly, is another favorite. Just the idea of them being oxygen starved is a turn on. We do play this within reason, however. Having them bound, though, does make slapping, punching and squeezing a bit easier. (Balls are swollen in the pic. Victims of CBT and oxygen dep.)
We have played with insertions, hence the recent urethral sounds purchase. We don’t do it in a painful manner, unless there is a bit of stretch. Some mild discomfort is about the extent. Again, I don’t want to actually damage anything.
I think the last thing to hit on is needle play, in CBT. I have, off and on, over the years, done safety pins, straight pins and sewing needles through my scrotum (not frequently) and the skin on my shaft (fairly rare). NW has had the pleasure of putting needles through the skin on my shaft (included pic).
I had never let a needle near my testicles, though. So, a few months back, I decided to try it. I had a 1 1/2″, 22ga, hypodermic needle. After binding my balls, I found the “perfect” spot, where I figured I was least likely to hit anything vital. Going very slowly, the needle pierced the scrotum, forced its way into my right testicle (I felt the jolt when it broke through), went pretty smoothly through the testicle and out the other side. Having some needle left, I pushed it into my left testicle, let it sit for a few moments, then removed it. This hurt, but not as badly as it could have (a good thing). It is not something that I would repeat often, or suggest that others do, given the potential for damage. It was, however, highly erotic, highly charged and I will do it again. I just don’t know that I could let NW do it. It is very much a feel as you go kind of thing.
So there it is! S&M as the giver. CBT as the receiver.